Bruce Kasanoff* relates the many lessons he has learnt since getting to know high-powered executive coach, Molly Tschang.
Out of all the hundreds of millions of people on LinkedIn, executive coach, Molly Tschang has posted more immediately actionable content than anyone I can name.
Over the past five years, Molly (pictured) — the founder of Say It Skilfully — has taught me an incredible number of invaluable lessons.
She showed me that every one of us can make a conscious decision about the energy we bring to each interaction.
I learnt that in many cases, I misjudge the signals that my body language sends to others.
An example is resting my chin in my hand to listen intently comes across not as intense focus, but as ‘bored indifference’.
She said smiling more often completely alters (and uplifts) how others view me.
This is a bigger insight than it sounds, because for decades I thought people knew that I liked them or was engaged, but because I only smiled on the inside, they did not know.
Today, my smiles are genuine, because with Molly’s encouragement, I literally learned to smile on the outside.
She taught me that if we don’t say what needs to be said, we are just as big a part of the problem as the person we think is at the heart of any problem.
So when Molly asked me to once again be a guest on her podcast, it was my pleasure to say yes.
Our episode just came out and it was her 150th show, which is quite a milestone for someone who wasn’t sure whether she wanted to launch such an initiative.
Before it was a radio show and podcast, Say It Skilfully started as a series of 90-second videos that Molly posted on LinkedIn.
Each one gives you the exact words you need to deal with a difficult conversation such as ‘how to help your boss be self-aware’ or ‘how to be heard at work’.
Molly has now launched a free Say It Skilfully mini-course, which brings many of her videos together to give you the words you need to speak up in a respectful and effective manner.
Why, you may wonder, should you even bother? It’s safer to keep your head down and just get your salary.
Right?
Wrong.
Molly makes an effective case that anyone who doesn’t say what needs to be said becomes part of the problem.
You unintentionally support a negative business culture, or worse.
Watching Molly, I recognise the genius in what she does.
In a typical 30-second conversation starter, she expresses respect for the other person, voices her support for his or her goals, and offers a reminder that her intentions are positive.
Only then does she offer a message that’s useful even when it isn’t easy to hear.
As I write these words, my only regret is that perhaps 80 per cent of the people who read this will think they are too busy to check out Molly’s content, or to listen to her podcast.
That’s a true shame, because Molly can make you a far better communicator, and she asks nothing in return except that you say what needs to be said.
*Bruce Kasanoff is the founder of The Journey, a newsletter for positive, uplifting and accomplished professionals. He can be contacted at kasanoff.com.
This article first appeared at kasanoff.com.
