26 September 2023

Who put the poo in the potoroo?

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Starting off in NSW today where closed-nose ecologists are busy wiping around the south coast of their State to find the elusive rabbit-size ‘primitive’ animal, the Long-footed Potoroo.

According to the erk-ologists, the key to finding the endangered species is to sniff through the ‘poo of their predators’ to find if they’ve been eaten by cats, foxes, dingoes or quolls.

Explaining how scientifically the potoroo searching program works, NSW Minister for Environment summed it up with the most appropriate of appropriate descriptions.

“It’s a crap job,” the Minister said.

He advised the public not to confuse the Long-footed Potoroo with the Long-nosed Potoroo, a mix-up that would seem to expose itself, PS-sssst! thinks!

Better banking

A friendly message to the Reserve Bank of Australia now which is grappling with the task of restraining inflation by pushing up the cost of money (i.e. interest rate) so fewer products will be bought and the costs of said products will fall and inflation will be deflated.

The Bank has wisdom at its economic best, but, as anyone who has tangled with economics knows, it is the ‘Dismal Science’ to wit: ‘Dismal’ is defined is “causing gloom or dejection” and ‘Science’ defined as “dealing with a body of facts or truths”.

As one of the millions of Australians gloomly dejected by the dismal half of the bank’s tasking, PS-sssst! has a suggestion that would lighten the eco-gloom, maintain the collection of highly costed money while at the same time taking a step towards un-dismalism.

Instead of pouring the hard-earned workers’ moneys into the pockets of well-off bank shareholders, a huge pile of which will go overseas, the bank diverts the workers’ money onto their mortgages so they get it back long after the need to demolish inflation has been achieved.

It might also be something positive after all the suffering being forced onto Australians today.

Statement of fact

It happens to all brilliant, brazen, bright and brainy columns (even PS-sssst! on a good day!) that the occasional week turns out to be genuinely ‘weak’ when the assortment of activities available to write wisely is so short it has to be scrounged up like this and exposed (or erroneously misreport) as a wide world of missing wisdom with nothing to show for it!

This week is one of those, wise reader, when the usually extensive selection of PS-sssst! propaganda to puzzle and perturb its patrons is bare and barren and head PS-sssst!er is forced to stoop a section with babbling blather in the absence of anything better to write about.

Challenge achieved!

Common cents

And just to prove we have nothing to misreport, the following attempt at humour was found under one of the office chairs, wher even the chair wouldn’t own up to it!

It asks: Why are we often invited to ‘Put our two cents in’ to a debate or conversation when they only offer a ‘Penny for our thoughts’?

Best ask Penny!

In scam we (don’t ) trust!

And finally, another reminder to stay alert and wide awake for Scams that continue to wrangle their way unwanted into all corners of the modern world, with the public sector just as fragile as any other.

While it’s never too often to raise a reminder, PS-sssst! can’t guarantee it won’t be scooped over by a shameful Scam some day, it has done its best to persist pure and peerless so far and proposes to pursue perfection and preserve its effort effectively!

As a reader you can play a role of course, and that’s to check you have “News” in your title when visiting ‘psnews.com.au’ or contacting [email protected].

If in doubt, remember it’s the ‘news’ that makes the difference!

Till next week….

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