Brian de Haaff* says the fear of missing out (FOMO) can often drag leaders down into a swamp of minor detail. He suggests a better way.
You probably know the top 10: Spiders, snakes, heights, needles, and public speaking all make the list of the most common fears that people have.
I feel fortunate that none apply to me.
Although heights are not my favourite, I do not crumble when I encounter a precipitous edge.
However, there is a phobia that I frequently see from folks in all types of leadership roles — from early-stage start-up founders to established senior managers.
The fear of missing out (FOMO) is very real for many leaders.
They think they should be involved in everything always, or else they will miss out on some opportunity.
FOMO is not something you consciously choose.
It is a visceral response to your environment.
Like any phobia, this one is usually borne out of past experiences, panic about the unknown, and even as a learned response from others.
You may have seen other leaders act this way and follow suit as you assume more responsibilities over time.
Or maybe the fact that a lot is out of your control is the trigger.
So you are hypersensitive to what might happen if you are not involved in a project or attend a trade show or miss a meeting — so you aim to always be there.
If you are in a leadership role you might even see FOMO as an advantage.
After all, folks on the team need your perspective, guidance, and feedback.
If you are deeply enmeshed in every detail of the work from the start then you can do an even better job as a coach.
However, there is a serious problem with this kind of thinking.
You will be pulled in every direction.
When you are involved in so many things you will find that you cannot do any one thing well.
There is an alternate approach that is the exact opposite of FOMO.
I call it FOBI — the fear of being involved.
FOBI is an always-on condition and just as visceral as FOMO.
Both are rooted in a fear of failure.
The nuance is in how you respond to that fear.
FOBI is about being concerned that you will not be able to focus on what is most important.
If you are scattering yourself across everything, your concern is that you are giving time to things that do not need (or deserve) your attention.
Most people naturally gravitate towards FOMO, but I believe FOBI generally has a healthier outcome for the individual and the organisation.
Even if you are a long-time FOMO-er, it is possible to shift your thinking and make FOBI your default response.
You just need faith and to hold that the following is true:
“It is just as important that I assiduously avoid what I deem to be non-critical or distracting as it is for me to embrace what I believe can bring success.
“FOBI requires exceptional critical thinking skills, and there have been times when I do not get it exactly right.
“Rather than panic, those moments inspire me to keep my focus on the overall strategic direction for the organisation — setting tangible goals that people can understand and reference daily.”
With clear goals and a talented team of people who are energised by the organisation’s mission, you can unleash folks to achieve together.
Sustainable and healthy organisations thrive on clarity of purpose.
Remember, the behaviour leaders model becomes the operating philosophy that powers the organisation.
It is your great responsibility to chart a sound path that others can follow toward collective success.
Change your mindset to change that trajectory.
*Brian de Haaff is the Chief Executive of cloud-based software company Aha! He can be contacted on Twitter @bdehaaff.
This article first appeared on the Aha! company website.
