Reviewed by Rama Gaind.
By Despina Meris, Hardie Grant Books, $34.99.
A nine-year quest to become parents has resulted in what has been a turbulent journey for Meris. It’s a real-life story that is stranger than fiction; one couple’s extraordinary journey to parenthood across three continents.
The anguish of what it’s like to live for years with uncertainty is palpable.
After Despina and her husband, Bill, relocated to Australia from New York, they decided to concentrate on starting a family. However, they never expected to encounter a string of medical upheavals that followed. There was a string of heartbreaking unexplained miscarriages, even with the help of IVF.
They then turned to surrogacy — first in India, then in the Ukraine and finally in Thailand, where their baby is conceived. More drama ensues. Overnight they get caught in the Thai government crackdown on commercial surrogacy, leaving them with no way of contacting their pregnant surrogate.
When it seems like all the odds are stacked against you, what lengths would you go to have a baby? What would you put your mind and body through in the name of parenthood? Meris thought it would be simple, but found herself chasing IVF, egg donors and international surrogacy in her bid to become a parent.
This biography is more than just the drive to have a child. It’s an eye-opening insider’s knowledge – through first-hand experiences – of the IVF and surrogacy industries, and the way women are treated in the fertility merry-go-round.
The Melbourne-based writer and editor has undertaken extensive infertility research that has led her to engage with online forums about domestic and international surrogacy, adoption, miscarriage support and egg donor selection.
Regardless of all the setbacks, Despina says the birth of her son, Evander, has changed her life forever!