Travis Bradberry* says living with constant stress is damaging to careers, relationships and health. While stress cannot always be avoided, he has advice on how to manage it.
We all know that living under stressful conditions has serious emotional, even physical, consequences.
So why do we have so much trouble taking action to reduce our stress levels and improve our lives?
Researchers at Yale University finally have the answer.
They found that stress reduces the volume of grey matter in the areas of the brain responsible for self-control.
So experiencing stress actually makes it more difficult to deal with future stress because it diminishes your ability to take control of the situation.
A vicious cycle if there ever was one, but don’t be disheartened.
It’s not impossible to reduce your stress levels; you just need to make managing stress a higher priority.
The sooner you start managing your stress effectively, the easier it will be to keep unexpected stress from causing damage in the future.
Luckily, the plasticity of the brain allows it to change and rebuild damaged areas as you practice new behaviour.
Implementing healthy stress-relieving techniques can train your brain to handle stress more effectively.
Here are strategies to help you fix your brain and keep your stress under control.
Say No: T he more difficulty that you have saying no, the more likely you are to experience stress, burnout, and even depression.
Saying no is indeed a major challenge for many people.
Saying no to a new commitment honours your existing commitments and gives you the opportunity to successfully fulfil them.
Disconnect
Technology enables constant communication and the expectation that you should be available 24/7.
It is difficult to enjoy a stress-free moment outside of work when an email about work can drop onto your phone at any moment.
Taking regular time off the grid helps you to keep your stress under control and to live in the moment.
Forcing yourself offline and even turning off your phone gives your body and mind a break.
Studies have shown that something as simple as a weekend email break can lower stress levels.
Choose blocks of time where you will cut the cord and go offline.
You’ll be amazed by how refreshing these breaks are and how they reduce stress by putting a mental recharge into your weekly schedule.
If you are worried about the negative repercussions of taking this step, try first doing it at times you are unlikely to be contacted — maybe Sunday morning.
As you grow more comfortable with this, and as your co-workers begin to accept the time you spend offline, expand the amount of time you spend away from technology.
Neutralise toxic people
Dealing with difficult people is frustrating, exhausting, and highly stressful for most.
When you need to confront a toxic person, approach the situation rationally.
Identify your own emotions and don’t allow anger or frustration to fuel the chaos.
Also, consider the difficult person’s standpoint and perspective so that you can find solutions and common ground.
Even when things completely derail, you can take the toxic person with a grain of salt to avoid letting him or her bring you down.
Don’t hold grudges
The negative emotions that come with holding onto a grudge are actually a stress response.
Holding onto that stress wreaks havoc on your body and can have devastating health consequences over time.
Researchers at Emory University have shown that holding onto stress contributes to high blood pressure and heart disease.
Holding onto a grudge means you’re holding onto stress. Letting go of a grudge not only makes you feel better now but can also improve your health.
Practice mindfulness
Mindfulness is a simple, research-supported form of meditation that is an effective way to gain control of unruly thoughts and behaviour.
People who practice mindfulness regularly are more focused, even when they are not meditating.
Essentially, mindfulness helps you stop jumping from one thought to the next, which keeps you from ruminating on negative thoughts.
Put things in perspective
Our worries often come from our own skewed perception of events.
Before you spend too much time dwelling on what your boss said during the last staff meeting, take a minute to put the situation in perspective.
If you aren’t sure when you need to do this, try looking for clues that your anxiety may not be proportional to the stressor.
If you are thinking in broad sweeping statements like “everything is going wrong” or “nothing will work out” then you need to reframe the situation.
A great way to correct this unproductive thought pattern is to list the specific things that actually are going wrong or not working out.
Most likely you will come up with just one or two things — not everything.
Use your support system
It’s tempting, yet entirely ineffective, to attempt tackling everything by yourself.
To be calm and productive you need to recognise your weaknesses and ask for help when you need it.
This means tapping into your support system when a situation is challenging enough for you to feel overwhelmed.
Everyone has someone at work and/or outside work who is on their team, rooting for them, and ready to help them get the best from a difficult situation.
Identify these individuals in your life and make an effort to seek their insights and assistance when you need it.
Something as simple as talking about your worries will provide an outlet for your anxiety and stress and supply you with a new perspective on the situation.
*Travis Bradberry is the award-winning co-author of the bestselling book, Emotional Intelligence 2.0, and the co-founder of TalentSmart.
He can be contacted at TalentSmart.com.
This article first appeared on the TalentSmart website.
