A difficult park isn’t a threat; it’s an opportunity. An opportunity to demonstrate competence under pressure. To practise staying calm when the stakes feel unreasonably high. Photo: iStock.
Paul Lyons says the mental toughness he developed to successfully complete a difficult parallel park in dense Melbourne traffic can also be used to negotiate challenges in the workplace.
There it is. A parking space. The only parking space within a square kilometre of my destination.
It’s doable but difficult, as it’s wedged between a Mercedes that costs more than my house and a van driven by someone who clearly learned to park during a dream.
Behind me, three cars are queueing up like planes over Tullamarine approaching curfew time, their drivers radiating murderous impatience.
The indicators are on. I’m committed. There’s no backing out now — metaphorically or literally.
Sure, my driving skills are important, but this is where the mental game takes over, separating the mentally tough from those people still circling the block in search of a parking station mirage.
My inner critic immediately pipes up from the passenger seat inside my brain: ”You can’t do this. Remember that time in the Aldi carpark? The scraping noise? The witnesses?”
Meanwhile, my hands are sweating, my heart’s racing, and I’m fairly certain the bloke in the BMW behind me is filming this for TikTok.
At the same time, I’m seriously contemplating copping out, to carry on driving while telling myself the space is too small (it isn’t) and that I ”need the exercise anyway” (I do).
Just in time, sanity prevails and with it the 4Cs mental toughness framework (well, I am a mental toughness expert. Allegedly).
Control: This kicks in first. I take a deep breath. While I can’t control the space size or the queue behind me, I can absolutely control my response.
Staying calm thanks to good old emotional regulation stops the panic spiral. Life control reminds me that I’ve completed way harder things this week, let alone ever.
Commitment: I become totally focused. I want this space, and I’m committed to parking in this space.
Goal-oriented thinking breaks it down: Check mirrors, turn wheel, reverse slowly. Achievement orientation kicks in — no melodrama. Just execution.
I’ve parallel parked successfully hundreds of times. This is just another one, albeit with an increasingly hostile audience.
Challenge: This reframes everything. This isn’t a threat; it’s an opportunity. An opportunity to demonstrate competence under pressure. To practise staying calm when the stakes feel unreasonably high.
Instead of ”everyone’s watching me fail”, it becomes ”free skills practice with an audience”.
Confidence: This seals the deal. Confidence in my own ability to get this done. I have passed my driving test for a reason.
My interpersonal confidence helps me ignore the imagined judgments of strangers I’ll never see again. I’ve got this.
Within a minute of spotting the space, talking myself into and then out of the parking manoeuvre, and then back into a mentally tough mindset and going through the process, calmly and competently, I’m in the space perfectly.
The BMW driver gives a grudging nod as he presses Send on TikTok.
I can take that experience into the office. As can you.
That quarterly presentation with the board watching? Same mental muscles. The tight deadline with everyone depending on you? Identical challenge. The high-stakes client meeting where everything must go perfectly? Same again.
If you have parallel parked, you’ve already practised staying composed under pressure in a situation where absolutely nothing is at stake except your pride.
Parallel parking in peak hour isn’t just about getting a space. It’s a masterclass in performing under pressure, controlling what you can, committing to the task, reframing challenge as opportunity, and backing yourself when it counts.
For me, there was the bonus of not having to walk a few blocks more each way, which, in Melbourne’s four-seasons-in-one-day weather, means I’ve avoided being soaked through by sweat or rain.
Paul Lyons is an experienced business leader, adviser and coach enjoying a diverse career across Australia and Asia. He can be contacted at [email protected]. This article first appeared on the Mental Toughness blogsite.
